Ben & Jerry’s New Flavor: Milano Zio

A satire.

Ben & Jerry’s unveiled its latest ice cream called “Pecan Resist,” a flavor that pays homage to the anti-Trump movement. The company’s founders announced that proceeds from sales of Pecan Resist will go to benefit four progressive groups including the Women’s March. The cover of the ice cream packaging includes illustrations of the organizers of the Women’s March, including those whom are fiercely anti-Zionist and proudly associate with antisemites including Louis Farrakhan.

Being progressive capitalists at heart, Ben & Jerry’s has opted to sell yet another flavor trying to appeal to progressives who aren’t antisemites. It is called “Milano Zio,” named after Alyssa Milano who refuses to be associated with the Women’s March until its promoters Linda Sarsour and Tamika Mallory condemn Farrakhan.

While Pecan Resist was mostly dark with chocolate ice cream and included an assortment of nuts, Milano Zio will be made of vanilla ice cream with pieces of Milano cookies to add a drop of color and crunch. A small sliced carrot will sit atop the ice cream, as a shout out to gefilte fish.

Asked by reporters why they decided to launch a new flavor trying to appeal to Jews and Zionists, the ice cream makers directed them to look at the message on the container. It reads:

“Together we can build a more just and equitable tomorrow. Just as Pecan Resist can foster a future that values inclusivity, equality, and justice for people of color, women, the LGBTQ community, refugees, and immigrants, we believe that there is a place in the world for Jews and a Jewish State. However, as progressives, we dare not include these people with our general message of inclusivity.”

Asked for clarification on what the statement meant, the Ben & Jerry’s spokesman said: “The Black Lives Matter and Women’s March were completely against the Jews and Zionists being included in our peaceful message so we needed to handle them separately.

Like the small number of Jews and tiny State of Israel, the Milano Zio flavor will only be sold in a new quarter pint size.

Proceeds from the sale of Milano Zio will go to Jerusalem’s Shaare Zedek Hospital’s new center for lactose intolerance.


Related First.One.Through articles:

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Don Lemon, Here are Some Uncomfortable Facts about Hate Crimes in America

Fun With Cause-and-Effect: Gaza Border Protests

Israel’s Kite Business Gets a Second Wind

Silwan Circulars, Christmas 2014

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One thought on “Ben & Jerry’s New Flavor: Milano Zio

  1. Pingback: “Antisemitism – The Musical” | FirstOneThrough

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